oh, not clear. but uhm, guess who? teehee.

everybodys going away


so ive been spending my day knitting shoelaces to my shoes. SO FUN RIGHT?? i know.

i should be getting ready [not to Sunnys party where most of you guys are going.] to cell group. having pot bless tonight. im bringing mashed potatoeeeesss.

leaving to camp tomorrow. happy are those who i will not interfere in their business for a couple of days. i'll lose part of my knowledge when i leave. sigh..
Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone?
You're whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone
Have you ever been touch so gently you had to cry?
Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?

/ Pink


yes, i have and am.

Music Festival

i know this is kinda off already since music fest was 4 days ago but anyways,
EKLEKTOS WON THE BAND CATEGORY.
:D its by God's grace and the teams effort made it all happen. congrats FRANCES, OSCAR, CALVIN, ERICA, STEPHANIE, STEFFI. fyi, Mandy and i screamed like crazy when they announced second place. :D

went out to 1B on Tuesday and Wednesday. nothing much happened really. yesterday was seriously a blur day for me. Steffi and Karen kidnapped me out from home to 1B. i was actually having my sleep, but a car drove to my house gate, so yeah. very very blur.

Camp Retreat is coming so soon. supa dupa cant waaaait. :) cell group this week would be the last meeting for every members in E1. after this week, E6 will be another part of the family. ahh.. man. pull the buckle tighter Jamie!
it hurts to know that that song does not sing to, for or about me anymore.

awake

webcamming and chatting with Steffi now. <3 look at the time.

yeaaah, i know right? didnt do this for a while now.

and guess what? we're going out at 11am. yeaaaahhhhh..

promises are to be broken

And I swear by the moon
And the stars in the sky I'll be there
I swear like the shadow that's by your side I'll be there
For better or worse
Till death do us part
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
And I swear
/ All 4 One

been away for a while

yeah well im having the laze to blog, just a teeny bit. i dont know if you guys have been reading my blog or not, especially the video. the video is some good stuff by the way. buka speaker, buka telinga. the title is in malay but the video is in English. please watch, really.

days passed. it has been hard for me, still striving through. unwillingly, sorta, but i feel a teeny bit better. it will come again. dont count on the jolly Jamie too much though. anyway, finally got my new phone. :] but theres one thing im really upset about. my messages cannot be transferred to the other. cant even save it into memory card, but managed to save it into the computer through SE PC suite. risky. what if my dumbo brother format the computer? everything will be GONE. im not gonna let that happen. so currently, still havent started using that phone yet. kept it in the drawer til i finally can sort things out. sigh..

Music Festival tomorrow. ticket is rm30. i dont have money man seriously. i have only rm6? still looking for a way to ask my siblings or mum for it. i cant not go laaaaaah. my church, my school, my friends are performinggg. i should, i must support. help a poor girl. :(

creepy-ish things has been happening. shook the soul out of Wendy and Apple. tiataulah. im not gonna care whats is and whats gonna happen. just stay cool and calm and everything will be just fine. *God please watch over me.* and i got immune to Happy Tree Friends. its not exciting anymore. how lah this. :(
everywhere i go, no matter what i do, what you didnt know, was that you made me love you deeper each day eversince we met on the very first day.

201 post

me and my heart. it pounds so hard in my ears i cant hear myself anymore, so hard that i cant breathe.

mistakes in life huh. how can i face it when theres so many. how do you want me to solve all of it. solve one and another comes. tell me how easy it is when it really isnt when the facts are written all over.

lie to me again.

i need my happy tree friends.
addictive:
when u have that something, youre happy.
when you lose it, u feel very sad and cant live without it.

happy tree friends is my current cure. my satisfaction.
kill me instead. bury me alive. i dont need these shits. you dont bloody know how it hurts. the pain is so unbearable. break me again. take all of me.

xanga updated.
twitter updated.
journal updated.
blogger updated.
facebook updated.

im done with my life.

kill me like a bullet

You pulled me under so I had to give in
Such a beautiful mess that's breaking my skin
Well I'll hide all the bruises; I'll hide all the damage that's done
But I show how I'm feeling until all the feeling has gone

Why I can't explain why it's not enough
Cause I gave it all to you
And if you leave me now
Oh just leave me now
It's the better thing to do
It's time to surrender
It's been too long pretending
There's no use in trying
When the pieces don't fit anymore
The pieces don't fit anymore

/ James Morrison

i give it all

long post. read if you care ler.

omg today was so hectic. today its our ASCF last meeting. special a bit la today, got food after CF. i was incharge of the food. it suppose to drop the food in school at 11.30am. Ernesha and i waited for that white van [we came to know that its brown, not white. ==..] til 12.30pm. panic like crazy man. borrowed Gianni's handphone to call Oscar for Gem's number to call aunty Rennie. so so regret i didnt bring my phone, argh. called aunty Rennie, she asked to call the caterer. the caterer asked me to call the driver. seriously hectic la.

the driver said he send already to the KITCHEN. so i thought it was the canteen cause there's a kitchen there. i asked both canteens, DONT HAVE. asked pn. Lo's for help, u know just in case the canteen people smuggled the food. >< i called the caterer. she gave weird instructions.
"u know from the gate. u walk straight, turn left then the kitchen is there."
i was like, HUH?? ISNT THAT THE HALL?? i didnt care la cause the koperasi was there so i thought they thought THATS the kitchen. asked, DONT HAVE.

panicked even more. Janice, Denise, Kim Ho, Ernesha and i was running here and there man, you have no idea. so i called the driver did he send to the right place.
"All Saints KK bah kan?"
"TIDAAAAKKKKK. All Saints yang the sebelah st. Agnes tu. All Saints Likas."
everything was SO SOOO messed up. the caterer was referring to All Saints Cathedral's KITCHEN. the caterer called me and tell me that i have to get the food myself cause if the driver goes, he will take a long time from Penampang to KK. and that time was 1pm already, imagine la rush hour. told pn. Lo asked if can send me go. i thought of Ah Bun cause he suppose to pick me also one after CF.

he rushed to school to get me. 1.20pm. drove to KK. got confused with the roads for a moment, reached, FOUND THE FOOOODDDD. rushed back to school. 1.40pm. Denise called while we were rushing back.
"people going home already. later we tapau the food only la."
i almost wanna cry already man that time. :( rush rush rush, before i reached to canteen, everybody saw the food. surprisingly, they cheered. i felt a teeny bit relieved, cause i told myself,"okay, have to handle Apple's and pn. Lo's teguran. ><". BUT, nothing. everyone was happy. :O

gosh. :') thank God man seriously. THANK GOD. i was praying and speaking in tongues while waiting for Ah Bun. some people that passed thought i was speaking indian or something. ==.. lots of running around man. gate to CF room to gate to canteen to CF room to canteen again to gate to CF room and to gate. and i think Ernesha and i got darker. imagine standing under the sun for an hour. :(

i said so many thank you's today. to:
Oscar for giving me Gem's number. [twice]
Gem for giving me aunty Rennie's number. [twice]
aunty Rennie for helping me to call the caterer and the number. [many times]
madam Vun, the caterer for giving me the drivers number and sort things out. [many times]
driver for... driving.
school guard for lending me his phone to call Ah Bun.
Ah Bun for driving me and lending his phone.

lastly, im so so so so sorry Elaine for ruining your birthday. :( forgive meeee... AND Derek for not having onion ringggggsss. :( i was so so scared man. my breathing now is still unstable. i still can hear my heart beat pounding in my ears. AAAAHHHH!! :/ i guess tonight's praise report is gonne be interestingggg.

Happy Birthday Elaine!

im so happy

because today was dissection daaayyy!! :D the whole class stink of rodents man. uggh.. at 8am sharp we brought them down to Biology lab. teacher explained the procedure and, here comes the chloroform! it was SO creepy. their eyes are still open even when theyve fainted. i was so so scared to put my rat in. its as if the ones in the chloroform container are staring at me. DEAD SCARY.

teacher demonstrated first before we started. OH! we had visitors! Derek, Sunny, Miah. :) Olivia took the rat out of the container, cause i was too afraid. xD Elaine pinned it to the wax board and SKINNED it. opened it upppp, inner being literally exposed, haha. there was 4 livers. :O and we discovered where its pee and poop came from. we saw it too. xD the pee was bubbly. HAHA.

the best thing was, we took all the organs out. :D the saddest thing was, it died before we could see its heartbeat. :( ngeh. some of the groups turned it around and opened their brains. :O their eyeballs look like sagu. o.o

everything went well. no one puked nor cried. teacher Judy expect that we will. HAH! :P some of the lower forms came in, screamed. ==.. i scolded one of them because she yelled at my ear while i was cutting the rat. grr.. we all really looked like surgeons because of the masks and gloves. :D I SHOULDVE BROUGHT MY PHONEEEEE.

ASCF. *check*
seranta. [tomorrow.]
badminton. *check*
class photo. *check*

lazy wanna upload in facebook. i love my blog more. :P my groups rat. :D stole this from Miah.
we took out all the organs. xD




APPLE WHY YOU DIDNT COME TO SCHOOL TODAAAYYY!!!!! >=(

dissection

IS TOMORROW!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I CANT WAIT MAN, I CANT WAAAAAITTT!!!! its gonna be soooo fun! :D

photo shoot week. have to look extra good everyday. xD
pandu puteri. [im secretary but they didnt call me so, blah. i go BOMBA.]
ASCF. *check* [YES YES YES!! in the picture this year.
i was absent last year when they did. ):]
seranta. [not yeettt. frrrday.]
badminton. [tomorrowwwww.]
class photo. *check*

pleeeaaaase visit my xanga. will be going to and fro, from blogger to my other blogger and to xanga, back to blogger. haha. :D

u guys seriously have to listen to Broken Strings // James Morrison feat. Nelly Furtado man. its so, so, sooooo well written and sung. :)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! DISSECCTTIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOONN!!!!

its finally over

wheeeeee!! oral is HISTORYYY!! phew, i did well. :D my legs went shaky shaky, but it didnt affect my speech. overall marks? 28/30 phewwww..

i cant wait for dissection! the ooey gooey hooey kooey looey dooey... haha. its on Thursday. lower form is gonna see us SLICE the rats' boday. and blooooood... and maybe some vomits. =x come ah Apple, Wendy and Mitran. photttooooo!!! :D starts at 8am til 12pm, i think. woohoo. :D

i feel the burdens, responsibilities and fun is slowly given by cell group and ASCF. things are getting exciting. i need to work hard. i have to make all things possible and from better to best. for the team and for God. i must. :)

oh, WAGAMAMA.
boss & bosses boss. xD


yeeehhhhhhhh...
she kept laughing that night. cute kaan. haha. :)
she was chewing. Oscar free show. haha.
So now you see
Why I'm scared
I can't open up my heart without a care
But here I go
It's what I feel
And for the first time in my life I know it's real

/ Demi Lovato

interact installation night

yes, so last night was Installation Night. buckets of pictures in facebook aeh? im so glad my seranta babes had fun. :) though i feel a teeeeeny bit left out, but hey, we can hang out WITHOUT being in dinners right? :P

i went Waterfront after youth. :D a great dose of fun even when im not in Installation Night. im glad i didnt go. teeheehee.. a church of koreans visited youth. gosh, they danced so beautifully. *.* had an altercall, and yeah. it was amazing. :) the launching video will be up next week in youth. imma steal it and post it here. :D cant waittt!!

woohoo!! going Wagamama tomorrow for a cell outing. *wide grin* im coming fishiieessss!!! >O

went shopping with my sister. i left rm3.............. T.T i really need t control on my expenses. ARGH. frustrated at myself after thinking how much ive spent on unnecessary stuufffss. T.T *control Jamie control*
your voice is the soundtrack of my everyday melody.

8 months

the night view of Waterfront. so prettyyy.. :)

Taylor Swift song spoil my mood. xD [sorry Wendy. :P] her song all emo emo baahh. made me thought about a lot of stuffffffs. surprisingly, im still listening to them. haha. xD bah, biarlah.

yay!! i took picture with Wendy already. like, FINALEEHHH. no wait. she took picture with me. xD oh and another yay. yay!! oral wasnt today. mine will be on Tuesday. AAAAHHHH!! thank goodness im not the first to go up. Joshua, Jeremiah, then ME! :D teacher started alphabetically from the bottom to the top, just so youre wondering.

switched to listening to The Fray. bye bye Taylor. teeheehee... :P

ASCF had a commitee meeting today. i so so SOO cant wait for the planned items that will happen this year laaaa. i was sorta upset la cause they were also talking about the next years commitees. i wasnt upset cause we're taking over and have more responsibilities crap. i was because the form 5's are leavingggg... :( its the bonded relationship. the never spoken to's and the not really close has now become buddies. a family to be exact. i guess changes are good? yeaah, the are. the commitees in years to come are gonna make a difference in CF. lets work together to glorify God's name! :D i really really cant wait. :)

what else? hmm.. i should start studying soon. have that burden-ish-ish and urge to do so. Jamie you can do it ya? :)

ohya! so i found two phones thats very interesting to me.
C901. this phone is sooooo pretty man. a very girly phone. so niceee! =3
W705. this phone has WiFi and it has Walkman player AND the battery last longer?
i know i know, so greeeedyy. i chose C because its camera based and i take a lot of pictures. but it has this thin bars in between the keypads. i text a lot so, it'll disturb me typingggg. BUT W has great musics....... suggestions? :D

updated my xanga loves! :D
some things are sealed & its for the future to discover.

fluuusshh

one word: tired. no wait, two words: very tired. and yes, i still got the nerve to update my blog though i have this really annoying constant headache. :( have not been sleeping well, and had loads things to do. just so u know where all these exhaustion is coming from.

i really love my blog song. its sung by Katharine McPhee. please listen to it. pleaaaase Derek? :D teeheehee..

okay since oral is tomorrow. MIGHT be tomorrow, i shall.. revise it here? :) it will not be the exact sentences from the script, but it has the same meaning anyway.

a very good morning to Miss Sophia Tsen and to my fellow classmates. today, i am going to share some information on my experience with floorball.

floorball is a sport that was originated in Sweden. floorball is a type of floor hockey and is played indoors. the International Floorball Federation is the worldwide governing body for the sport of floorball. typical equipments for a floorball player consist of an indoor sport shoes and a floorball stick. the maximum size for a floorball stick is 105cm that is made up of carbon and composite materials. as for the goalkeepers, they wear protection gears, such as gloves, knee pads, a helmet and padded pants. a floor ball has a diameter of two and a half inches and it is very light.

each team should only field six players at a time on the court, one being a goalkeeper. a floorball game is officially played over three periods lasting twenty minutes each. there are two referees to oversee the game.

i came to know this sport when i first joined my church's youth group. i started to play and slowly got the hang of it. after much practice, i became of the best defenders. a defender is a player who assist the goalkeeper by guarding the goal. a defender is also one of the most painful post because there is no protection gear for them. i get bruises from defending the ball and it normally last for a couple of days. i got used to it after a while.

i have a floorball stick, a present from my church members. its name is Duane. Duane has a yellow-green colored blade, as well as its shaft, circled with white grips. some parents my think that floorball is a dangerous sport, but there is nothing to worry about. there are always rules in every sport and one of the common one in floorball is high stick. high stick means lifting the stick up in the air or above waist level. it is not allowed in the game, otherwise the person will be penalized. i think floorball should be introduced to schools because it is an exhalarating and fun sport.

thank you.

oww, my haand. phew, that took a long time. i know it sounds a bit informal and short, but hey, IVE MEMORISED IT ALREADY MAN. BOOOOOO.

teacher Lim Sok Hoon says: if you sleep, you will get thinner. if you dont sleep, you will get fatter. >=D i shaaalllll!
What I'm trying to say is that
I'm feeling a change and
I'll let it take all over
If you need time away
I won't ask you to stay
But I don't want to lose you

/ Colbie Caillat

sweet sound to my ears

tired. really tired. todays CF treasure hunt was great. though some clues went missing. OKAY A LOT went missing, but hey, everyone had fun right? :) yay! i passed the bible quiz! pheww.

well, my ORAL [happy Mitran? haha. :P] will be on Friday. *breaaaaathesss*

headache. must ciao.
It's funny how you think you really know yourself
Like you would never lose yourself to someone else
And I was up to thinking it was all about you and me
Silly silly me
I should have never listened to a word you said
But I was always giving in to promises
I never should have gone for
I should never long for you no matter how hard it gets
And I want this to be over
I so want this to be through
In the end somehow it always comes back to you

/ Katharine McPhee
Jamie supercallifragalisticexpeallidocious Lee

reconsider


okaay, maybe not c510. Vern said the W series' batteries last longer, which got me thinking. AAHH!! :( so choices are: c510; w950i; w760i.

media team had a photo and video shoot just now. Joyce, Max and i are the VJ's. it was so much fun!
Joyce: the lively one.
Max: the dude. xD
me: the blur one.
the room was filled with laughter man. thank God it was a soundproof room? but Reese went out of battery so couldnt do more bloopers, haha. it'll be complete and up soon. imma try get the video and upload it here for you guys who arent Eklektos-ians to watch. :D stay tune!

my migraines are back. :( OH and unfortunately, aural is presented IN FRONT OF THE CLASS. omg omg omg omg. this is soo, sooooo baaad.. T.T no chilly hands and shaky shaky legs pleaaasseee..

supercallifragalisticexpeallidocious
i have the confidence to go through it all,
but will i survive? eventually?

take all of me

mum says my hair is taking up my life. its too long she says. thats the point, i want to leave it long. bad thing about it is, its getting split ends. should i trim only or cut my hair to another style? but, what? :S

thanks for the phone suggestions Fiona & Nigel. :) i think ive made up my mind. C510. the color: energetic red is something out of the ordinary, but the button at the center is very ugly. total turn off, haha.

Mrs. Lorna was pissed about the h1n1 rumors spreading around the school. i guess someone sent her a text too. xD oh well, back to English aural. dream on Jamie. T.T

i should be sleeping now? nights.
never to be seen again.

*beep*

i still cant look for a phone that im satisfied with. flip? slide? candy bar? the many people i asked told me to choose one of the Nokia models, but i prefer SE. some models i really like but it isnt suitable due to my overrated texting. apa macam ineeehhh... frustrated. :( you guys decide for me la. :D

no floorball today, as usual. OHNO. English aural coming uppp.. *dies* im so, so, SOO terrified. it might be speaking in front of the class. though im not standing on a stage, but i do have stage fright. i dont like the many eyes staring at me and the silence. :( please oh pleaaaaase be one-on-one with teacher. T.T i even get nervous sweats thinking about it. aaahh!!

i desperately need to go out to shop laa. ive been stuck in Likas area for too long. :(
things would be better if i wasnt around.

rumours runs

this is my Kavita. shes leaving tomorrow. im gonna miss her so much. :( my shopping friend and a person who listens to my problems. im so grateful to have met her. :) bye bye sayang. :/

i receive a text saying that a student from 4A and 5A got infected by H1N1. real or not? nobody knows. we'll just wait til Monday then.

youth was extra great today. the Tsens worship lead: Frances and Vector. they should have a duet or something. both of them sound so good. another two star singers in Eklektos. they should go for tryouts. :) hmm well, i was at the PA. Vern showed me some gigs and tricks. first time, didnt mess up. good enough gua. a seranta in school and church. feels like a family. :) the PA was more complicated and bigger than the one in school. i only adjust the volume in school anyway so, hah.

the unexpected happened today. it should be something exciting and happy, but instead, i feel so down. i dont know why. maybe cause its different now. i couldnt do or say what i wanted to anymore. why does it have to be that way..
maybe things happen when you think of it too much.
but why does it happen otherwise of what i imagined?